I’d make a lousy boss. Well, I’d at least make a lousy “tough” boss. I don’t like firing people, I don’t like turning people away, I don’t like saying no.. and sometimes you just have to.

Today was a very long and, at times, a very frustrating day.

I spent about 5 hours this morning struggling with a piece of software that had decided to go crazy on me just a few days earlier. I had put off tackling the beast till today and after 5 hours, I hadn’t gained any ground. That was frustrating.. I know computers and it takes a lot for a piece of software to “outsmart” me.. Finally I let it go and moved on to other things. Just a few short hours later I mentioned it to a good friend and he gave a suggestion which sparked an idea and voila! Fixed :). Take that beast!

So the big deal today was over a business partner of mine. He had chosen to walk away to pursue his own career interests, and then found out that it wasn’t necessary for where he wanted to end up in 4 years. Now he wanted his job back. It took almost a week for me to give him an answer and boy, did I ever struggle.. I put so much thought into it. I was looking for a reason to bring him back, looking for some sign that it would be the right decision and that things would work out. And in the end.. I said no.

That lead into a very long talk. He had expected that I would bring him back.. and I had pretty much expected it too. I need help with the business, I definitely need help.. but it has to be the right help. This young man has a lot of potential, I’ve seen it in him.. He just has to be willing to work for it and not give up, even when it seems like nothing is going his way.. We’ll see how things evolve over the next few days and weeks.. I wanted so bad to give him another chance but for his own good and especially for the sake of the company, I had to say no.

..Saying no isn’t easy guys. For some it may just be a natural thing.. for others its a real challenge. Learning to say no is so important though. You have your objectives in life, you have your goals, and your purposes, even if you don’t know it yet. If you don’t stick up for yourself and believe in yourself, someone WILL take advantage of that. They may not be doing it intentionally, they may actually just see it as a way of helping you.. but inside you know that you’re being taken advantage of, however slight the degree, and it eats at you. There’s NOTHING wrong with helping people.. there’s nothing wrong with putting yourself out there and backing others up when they need you.. Just make sure that you have your boundaries and that at the end of the day, you’re fulfilling your purpose in life. Otherwise, you’re bound to fulfill someone else’s.

So I had a lot on my mind today :).

I decided that after a week inside (yes! horrible I know!) I HAD to get out.. so I grabbed my basketball, hopped on the purple bike, and rode in style down to the basketball courts. I shot around for a few minutes and then was joined by this older fellow with a lot of energy. We hit it off, Don was his name if I remember right.. We shot around for a bit and then played some horse. He spent time into helping me with some moves and getting me to practice shooting with my left hand. It was a lot of fun :).

Then he had to split and after a quick glance around the court I spotted a young man on the other side making baskets by himself. I asked him over and after a brief intro, Jamar and I started cooking things up with another game of Horse. That lead into 21 and finally, “around the world.” I had a lot of fun and I really needed the excersise. We’ll see how sore I am tomorrow ;).

My girlfriend brought up something today that surprised me a bit and even though she was joking, it got me to thinking.. She said that I don’t ever seem to have enough time for her. Well, for the most part she’s right.. Its very seldom that I have time for just her.. Gosh, you’d think at 18 time would be the last thing I ever worried about ;). So, she’s got me thinking.. and I’m going to make a conscious effort to get even more done in the mornings so that I CAN spend time with my girl in the evenings.. mmm.. she’s totally worth it, worth every minute of all the work I do and more :). She’s always there for me.. even the times when I’m down and doubting myself, she’s there to support me, to cheer me on, and to tell me that she loves me. I really don’t know what I’d do without her, I really don’t.. unless it has something to do with cutting my hair, she’s the one person I would really have a hard time saying no too. Love you baby! :)

..And that’s just about that! Yup, that’s pretty much it.. I got a chance to watch American Idol this evening and uhh.. yup! guilty! I’m hooked.. =P. Singing is something that I realllly really enjoy and so its really cool to watch so many of these different styles of singers and musicians from so many backgrounds. I’m looking forward to tomorrow! ;)

Goodnight world! Got a lot coming up tomorrow!

-Jonathan Wold

Daily Action Step:

Being able to say no.. and making sure I went outside for some excersise!